“What’s my motivation?” Rules for movie villains

  1. If you have henchmen under your command, kill one. The reason for said henchman’s termination may be entirely arbitrary – talking back, failure to achieve a goal, looking at you funny – but the resulting diminution of your forces will surely be offset by the motivational effect of the increased fear and awe in which you are held.
  2. Further divide your forces by sending only small groups after your enemy. Respond to defeat by incrementing the next team by a few men, rather than significantly reallocating your resources to deal with the threat.
  3. Your mood setting should, at most times, be surly, angry, and egocentric. To keep people on their toes, it is optional to occasionally switch to an icy charm.
  4. Rather than attempting to motivate your henchmen with greed, rely on the force of your personality, combined with threats.
  5. It is absolutely required that when your enemy is finally in your grasp you indulge yourself with a long soliloquy, rather than immediately killing him.
  6. If you do attempt to kill your enemy, don’t hang around to make sure they are actually dead. Remember, out of sight is out of mind.